When you are in a Verbal or Emotional Abusive Relationship you battle to see how abusive a relationship is until you see a healthy relationship. An abusive relationship blinds you for what a healthy relationship can look like.
To be able to evaluate the “health” of any relationship, you have to look for the type of fruit it produces – Jesus said, “A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.” (Matthew 7:18–20)
A Non-Abusive Relationship shows “the fruit of the Spirit [which] is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5:22–23)
- Love: Seeking to do what is in the best interest of another.
- Joy: Living with an inner gladness of heart regardless of challenging circumstances.
- Peace: Displaying tranquility in the midst of hardships and trials.
- Patience: Enduring difficulties calmly without complaint.
- Kindness: Expressing genuine care and helping with a benevolent heart.
- Goodness: Displaying moral character and godly virtue with a pure heart.
- Faithfulness: Being loyal to appropriate significant relationships.
- Gentleness: Treating others with sincere respect, displaying a soothing disposition.
- Self-control: Exercising restraint rather than choosing to be undisciplined.